Hazel eyes

2006-12-26T10:19:00.000+05:30

"You know there are some very important memories buried in an old wooden chest in your heart. I am speaking memories of things you wanted to do and habits you wanted to change, people you wanted to thank and others you wanted to spend time with.

We never open up that old wooden chest frequently enough. Hey...what about today? Wouldn't it be a great day to turn some of those memories into action? "

Not my thoughts but yeah you can always map your thoughts when you can't give shape to it.

This is how it all started.

2006-01-19T18:27:00.000+05:30

Today is the best day for my music quest, I got 3GB of Illayaraja
mp3 songs. Huhhhhh!

I formated my notebook recently and I didn't take backup of my
song collections. Silly, but I was given limited time and priorities
cornered my interest. At last! I got it. The day went excellent in
listening to all the songs. I miss Sigaram and an other song from
Uyire unnakaga. Will transform them to CDs when I travel home
next week.

Music and books form the major part of my beautiful life.

"Every day is a different page and they can be full of surprises. You
will never know what is next until you turn the page" ~Sidney

All the time my mom scolds me for buying cds and books but yeah,
I always find reasons for stopping her. I listen only to popular
numbers in Hindi but in English and Tamil there is no limit. Everday
you find something new. I wish to write some posts on the songs
that I like and the lyrics both in Tamil and English. Let me see.

Recently I started collecting all old compilations, aruna sairam,
bharathiar songs. I have quiet good collection of AR which I flicked from
one my friend. I am expecting an other bunch of cds to be dumped on me
in coming week. They all enjoy watching me doing this without doing my
work and ofcourse what is more in life than keeping yourself happy.

Will continue this topic then there....

2006-01-12T11:49:00.000+05:30

"All of the early Thanks giving celebrations had one thing in common.
The thanksgiving was directed toward God. It did not matter that
many had very hard times. The people knew that God was their creator
and provider and that all good things ultimately came from Him."

Few days back we were discussing in room about the relation between
Pongal and Thanksgiving. We all were introduced to the thanks giving
holidays only when we worked with American nationals. I have a good
american colleague come friend who was basically mexican origin, we
used to share a lot about both the traditions and got to know from him
the history of thanks giving and he used to ask me everytime for every
festival we celebrate and sometimes he gets confused too. When he
asked about pongal, I said boss dont confuse it is nothing but your
thanksgiving.

There is a feeling in me that we share lots of similar practices across
culture.

My native is a very lovely typical village close to places in tamilnadu where
everybody loves to live. My parents moved to a nearby town before I
was born.

For us pongal used to be very important than Deepavali. Now things are
different and everyone in our family are busy with their own things. But
this was not the same before 6 or 7 years.

Thai onam thethi, we keep pongal in our home and then start to our native.
Matu pongal, ullavar thirunal than mukiyamana nale. That time my
grand father was alive and I long for such a life even now. Matu pongal was
so much fun for me (ammanimaatu pongal ungaluku thanenu sollareenganu
puriyuthu, but seriousa kathai kellunga), we prepare our farm for the
festival. Annaikuthan matuku, matu vandiku ellam paint adichu appadiye
pottuvechu parka allaga irukum.

Appuram enga thotathula kullaye ollaila oru fence poduvom. Antha
fencela adupu ellam set panni, nalla panai ellam paint adichu summa
gumunu irrukum. We also prepare something called thepakulam there, I
dont know whether you have heard of itbut it is made with cow dung and
mud (dont say whuhaaaaa, farmers live with everything).

All this work used to get over by 3 in the afternoon, appuram vetuku poi
nalla pudhu dress ellam pottu, matu vandila eri periya padaye thotathuku
povam. Lots of relatives, workers and some poor people in village visit
us on day, chinna ponnacha ellam ore partya than irrukum. Appuram
enga amma athai ellam sernthu pongal veipanga, that day they also
prepare that pacha arisi satham and gravy with thatapayir and all
vegetables from our farm. First ellathayum kalanthu adichu nama
mattu nanbargaluku ellam feed pannuvom. Then we serve for the
relatives and sapatuku appuram than real comedye. That thepakulam
that I mentioned anga matayalam verati enga maama ellam
villayaduvanga, the cows will go hit that thepakulam, hit each other
and finally they will demolish it. Maata kushi padutha few people join
and beat the drums and sing one song, konhcam sathama irrukum.

I always used stand with my grandfather. Enga moonu mamavum koncham
avanga young stagela busya irrupanga, namma avangala disturb
pannarathu illa.

Ippa ethellam ethuvum illa, niraya kanavugalum ninaivugalum matum
irruku. Now my uncles also moved out. Only once in a year or so, they allow
me to visit that village, ponnunganale koncham kastam than, they all look
at me differently now, pavadai satai ellam pottutu suthitu iruntha ponnu
anjarai adiku nina yaru than nambuvanga. Ippavum enga amma matu
pongal anniku avanga appava ninachu alluvanga,koncham kastamma
irrukum.

Namma aasai ellam seekiram entha functiona ellarthodayum enga orrula
kondadanum.

Ellorkum iniya pongal nal vazthukal.

2006-01-11T19:44:00.000+05:30

Bought Sidney Sheldon's "The Other Side of me" two weeks back
and took really long time to complete it. Sheldon has written or told
his story in a different style (atleast different from his own style). It
was wonderful to know about him, his greatest tale but remember
it is interesting only if you are interested to know him.

Now I am reading ludlum's "The Tristan betrayal". Just completed
150 pages of it. So far the story is interesting. I will write more (?) about
it when I complete it.

I observed that his quotes are really wonderful. In one situation the
author talks about a treaty that is signed between nazis and communist
and an other time when the hero goes to catch a flight where he says
about the difference between success and failure.

The relevance between the quotes and happenings are just wonderful.

"Hitler offers stalin a piece of paper to sign, a paper that says we are friends,
our interests coincide, we r partners. But what stalin sees in that treaty is
what he wishes to see; a reflection of his ambitions,his hopes, his
aspirations.....

...Truth is shattered mirror. strewn in myriad bits. each believes his little bit
is the whole truth"

"Dwell on the past, and you'll lose an eye;forget the past and you'll lose
both eyes"

"The difference between success and failure might be as slim as a few seconds"

hmm, every author is different from other and they are interesting. I started
reading english magazines may be from my final year. I have not read much
but I think I can fill in the gaps :). If I start with someone I first complete
all possible or available books of the author and then move to the next. Bad
practice but now days I am getting better.

Thought of reading "The class" after sidney sheldon's other side but was
little bored with reading segal continuously. Before my travel I read man,
woman & child, acts of faith. Have to read class and oliver story.

Let me not bore you more... :)

2006-01-10T12:12:00.000+05:30

With my monday blues wiped off, there is nothing new in my work till
now and life is peaceful :).

Weekend was movie time, had lots of choices but I prefered to watch
Sandai Kozhi. Linguswamy is always known for his influence in work.
Sandai Kozhi is not more than Anandham and Run but not less than
any other movies of its time.

Ennaku sivakasi poi, thulli adikarathula gilli, solli adikarthula blah..
blah... nu vijai padam parka istam illa. Entha expectationume illama
just wanted to watch a movie and this one didn't disappoint me.

Hero first patla nalla dance adi irrukar. As he mentioned in his interview
for anandha vikatan, koncham kala adikadi thookama dance adina innum
nalla irukum. Herovuku kadal sentimenta illa avanga appavukanu
theriyala. Chellame ppadathula vara mathiriye irruku "Ennamo
nadakirathe" pattu, koncham (ROMBAVE) sothapal but "Dhavani
potta" balances or overcomes the flaws.

Meera jasmina partha appadiye namma college natkal ninaivuku varuthu.
Enga warden friday 5 maniku munadi hostelernthu kilamba vida mattar.
Classe nadakatha government collegla, fridayna hostela utkarnthu enna
pannarathunu we used to change the 5 in the permission slip to 12:45.
Time of leaving appadinu pottu, 5ku munadiyum pinadiyum edam vittu
sign vanginathuku apparum12:45nu fill panniduvom. Meera jasmine has
done well. Ennaku ethukaga thalaiviku thalaivar mela parkarathuku
munadiye kadhal varuthunu than puriyala.

Some scenes in the movie was exceptional. I liked the scene when the
person from Madurai responds "Anna vizhakama sollunga payan mela
yarum kai vaikalayenu" ketkara scene nalla iruku.

With Yuvan, the director has got good support. If you are so bored
and need a change and just to laugh or not interested in build ups,
this one can be given a chance.

If anyone reads anandha vikatan every week, just let me know how
much you like its standard these days. I see nothing except star
interviews. I like madhan and Sujatha, for that matter I still continue
reading it. Vijai income tax raid vandhadha pathi rombaaaaaaa feel
pani irunthar, ivanga ellam panatha olunga katina en raid vara poranga?
Namala parunga, do we have an other chance to exclude it :)

Taking for granted, I have updated few links that I read often to my
new blogroll. Please do let me know if u r not ok with it.

2006-01-04T13:32:00.000+05:30

I was holidaying for one week after I returned to India and then got
back to work. It was expected that I will be busy but never had a
proper sleep after I came to bangalore. Things are going little dififcult
but as long as it is not going to remain the same it is ok!

Wish you all a very happy new year and it will be a successful year
for all of us.

Will be writing more and publishing all the comments soon.

2005-12-16T01:03:00.000+05:30

Only few lines, no words. I am completely blank. It is easy for
me to say that I am stubborn, but today I am little disturbed.

I wish I can understand what I am!

"There were hours that just went on for days
When alone at last we'd count up all the chances
That were lost to us forever"

I will try to be happy for that I am an angel as always to make this
place a paradise and all the memories cherish that!

2005-12-12T22:39:00.000+05:30

Few things before I start, My friends who always read this page but do
not dare to comment understood that I am really busy and not lying
without responding to mails. I did hop to few blogs that I have been
reading from the day I started.

Thanks for all your comments and questions, I am completely alright
except my workacholic nature.

I have a happy news to share with you, I got promoted last week. I dont
say that never waited for promotion nor expected I would get a one but it
was too early for me to think about it, end of my third year now I have
been forcefully taken to the middle management in the hierarchy.

This didn't bring much of excitement, you can see I am telling you after 10
days but yeah I am happy. I am a very greedy young girl but not fascinated
with holding authority.

It was very hectic during the previous week and was just back from Customer
site, now that goes without telling!

Take the remaining post as an other crap, I know it is the same meaningless
things that happen in everyone's life but trying to avoid the efforts to change
the meaningless is the crux.

I strongly believe in relations that are outside my personal space.
Many times we meet somebody very interesting and it does work out and
from there we build a new interesting relation. Recently there are few
intersting souls, that had changed my spirit and smile, some admire me and
some I admire.

I feel different when I think these are all passing clouds and nothing of these
I am supposed to get attached.

There may be a reason for why I met them and for why I cannot continue
talking and smiling with them. After all they supported me in things that I
had to change but couldn't.

I feel they are uncertain, uncertainities which most of *them* would have
hoped for and even me. When I became part of that moment, I couldn't
believe what happened to me and now that I know it I can do nothing
about it.

If I cannot write it here, I cannot share it anywhere. I will miss all these
uncertainities but yeah I know that there have been vacuum in some
corners of my memory.

This post adds an other entry to this page which is only aware of my
presence....

2005-12-05T23:42:00.000+05:30

Intha varam inniya varamnu sollara mathiri niraya vishayam nadanthiruku.

Erkanave perusu perusa post ezuthara naan ithayum ezuthinena makkal
migavum varutha paduveenga appadengarathala, ovoru incidenta ezuthalamnu
irruken!

By now you would have understood that I liked spicy food (Sapatu Rani).

In europe the taste of the green chillies are pathetic, so I use red chillies
that I got from home.

The colour of these chillies as you know will attract your neighbor who knows
nothing except cheese , cream and sauce. This is what always happens to me,
I give ample chances to my european friends to feel the colour of life. :)

One thing or other about my activities always provokes some interesting
conversation, as such I do not have better work to do except giving them
sessions on Indian culture.

The lady who was sitting (now I am in different site) adjacent to me told the
other guys that I ate twooooooooo red chillies. Ennala antha ammavuku poi,
intha millagai sapiduvatharku alla ithu thalipatharkaga nangal ubayoga
paduthuvathu appadinu solla mudiyathu, athanala sirichutu veetada
vendiyathu than.

When I was just giving my innocent smile, engiruntho oru kelvi, "What is
your mother tongue?". Neram ketta nerathula ithu enna kelvi appadinu
ninaichutu, namma bashaya sonnen, athukula opposite sidela irunthu
romba fasta "Sigapu Milagai, Pacchai Milagai" appadinu bayangaramana
loud speakerla oru answer. I was surprised with their interest or just
curiosity or aarva kollaru!

Ennathan google translate panninalum ennala germana sutham, sathama
vasika mudiyuma?

An other guy overcoming all these excitements of my counter parts brought
me 3 (exactly three) small red chillies from his garden the next day for me
with a note that he never uses them for cooking.

Antha milagai than ingu pugaipadathil ullathu.

(padam parthu kathai sollga appadinu kuda intha posta sollalam)

2005-12-01T17:56:00.000+05:30

Ethu ethukuthan aasai padarathune ellama aasai paduven,
sometimes it is very silly.

I have written about my yesterday's strong desire to have chicken
and the interesting (insulting) things that I crossed through.

Everday I have wheat bread, yogurt, fruits and juice in the morning.
I am not a very interesting person to have protein rich food but this
is what provided in the place where I stay. In the afternoon I have
my packed chapathi (I prepare). The reason not being diet
consciousness but basmati rice doesn't match my digestive system.
Night some upma or easy to eat fruits :)

Before I tell you more, something that you should know is that
I am really really a non vegetarian and if I have to like some
vegetarian food then it should have gobi,chana, mushroom or
what not!

To say it simple I like *only* spicy food and poor thing is that I
If I eat more (and especially when I am in a cold country) I have
to work out more. Balancing all these is pathetic for me.

Nalla surukunu rasam, sambhar (not like bangalore and not with
MTR sambhar podi), kathrikai poriyal hmm eppada vetuku poven
appadinu oru pakam, irrukanumnu oru pakam. Naan sambhar ellam
samaika maten, I hate the taste of *my* sambhar.

My friends find me as *****-eater sometimes but they have to handle
me, as mentioned in *senti* post, they are very good in understanding.

Now after long time I really wanted to eat rice with some spicy curry,
restaurant is the first option but sitting alone and smiling at everyone
before me is boring. I am alone in this place, there are some indians
who sell paper and work in restaurants, the intial days they started
talking to me but I got a strict warning and scolding my friend not to
give any more detail though I am alone. ( I always go out of topic)

Now to eat something and spicy and preferably nonveg forced me to
prepare chicken yesterday for my dinner and I carried it for today's
lunch too. Should I prepare the similar kind of gravy that I always
prepare and no was my answer. Downloaded how to prepare PEPPER
CHICKEN from ndtvcooks.com and was all set to go home.

I went to a store on the way to buy chicken and lemon, remember here
strictly no english on any products, by appearance I can feel it but I
should confirm it na.

Now with the chicken box I headed to everyone asking do u speak english,
do u, do u, do uuuuuuuuuuuuuuu enacting with my hands as wings and
nothing worked.

Finally I went to the counter to ask "IS THIS CHICKEN" and before she
answered me I can clearly see and hear that someone shouting at me. I
understood that he is thinking that I am overcoming the queue, oh boss
I am asking doubt but will he understand, NO. I ooked at this lady and
smiled thinking why on earth they dont speak english, as usual I smiled
at the guy and he didnt stop and i went back to put the chicken in my
basket, UUH!!

Magane enga oor pakam va appadinu ninachutu, I billed chicken, lemon,
tomatoes.

All this is for next two days, Sunday I am back to an other town where I
have to work for next few weeks. Naan software engineeranu ungaluku
doubt varalam!

Then with printed recipe, I prepared nice (ennaku) pepper chicken, nalla
irundhutha illayana recipe ezuthunavan than sollanum but it was
wonderful for me.

2005-11-30T19:46:00.000+05:30

Some BMW models from my camera!

Two post on the same day, koncham over than irundhalum I am so crazy
about cars and just some clicks from trip to a BMW museum.

2005-11-30T16:09:00.000+05:30

This line is very important for everyone, I read this in a article in
rediff today.

"what is right for me may not be right for you. What works for
you may not work for me and vice versa. You should not worry
about what I think of you or your work"

Surfing is part of our life, once in a interview we asked one guy
to write a script and he literally replied "Google". I didn't know
what to react, he is senior to me and I thought that is how we
grow. I cannot congratulate him to be so open to tell the truth
behind the success of the software engineers, all I did was "Your
profile does not match our requirements".

"Sometimes I don't know who to be
Hey what you're looking for
No one has the answer
They just want more
Hey who is gonna make it right
This could be the first Day of my life "

~First day of my life, Melanie C~

Life is full of aspirations, so much to achieve at every stage of it.
During college, just to get placed in campus mattered, then work. In
work it was always important how an individual stands above the
people of his/her age, then onsite. After going all around, the feel to
be at home overcomes everything.

US was the only place I thought I should go, then now to Europe, this
place is full of nature, beautiful. Now I am tired, you stay here or
there, you are always comfortable in the place where u belong.

Ok, now How many of you enjoy the "Good Hollywood movies" in Tamil,
Every week I see sharukh khan here talking deustch. This Friday we have
Swades in Deustch. I do not know whether they see that as emotional
drama or comedy. All I do is mute it, watch it :)

2005-11-28T15:59:00.000+05:30

Definitely couldn't stop myself writing about this, should I
feel it as excellent it will find its place here and also the
other way.

Athu oru kanaa kaalam (Dreamy desires), wonderful piece of Balu
Mahendra with Danush as hero, paired with Priya mani. Movie is an
other example of what we can always expect from Danush. Next
milestone for danush after Kaadhal konden but this is not as
sensible as kaadhal konden was.

Well narrated story line, emotions but what are they trying to
convey is still a question to me. Climax was the biggest comedy
to me, how may times will the hero get released at the end to live
with heroine. (Tamilnadu Police!!!!!!!!!)

It is not a crap, the performance of the artists, the camera and
the direction everything receives honor but this movie must have
been done during late 80s.

My interest is not always music, big cast or whatever! I do not
have any defined boundaries but something is really making me
feel hopeless about this.

This is just what I felt, may be I have a poor taste or different
expectations!

2005-11-25T20:38:00.000+05:30

Death is painful.

It is worse if we do not know the reason for dying. You
can be courageous to face to death and but we are not. We
love our life, we do not have the priveleges to live it in
the way we want but we struggle for it and we always make it.

They say that he died for the nation, but did he want to? He
went all the way to kill himself. Life without a father for
those two kids, will it be interesting?

Seeing his mother's photo and his family photo, should I
believe that God created evil too.

Army men anticipate it but they fight with it, he never realised
this.

My prayers for all who belong to you, Kutty.

2005-11-24T15:51:00.000+05:30

I was freezing, it was -3 degrees. Uhhhhhhhhhh!

Was surprised to see her, she was old (very old), she was carrying
three bags. She stopped to buy a daily. I watched from behind. I
was interested to ask whether can I help her, she might be afraid
of a stranger, do not know whether she speak English. Poor Me!

Anyway I approached, I stood near her and helped her take the bag,
then I showed my card and said I will be glad to drop her home. She
was happy too, we walked all the way to her home. She is 74 and
widow for 34 years, she spoke good english and had a portugese flag
in her house.

On the way she said that I am gorgeous (Heheee, she never saw an
Indian) , she asked me whether I am married, I told very soon. I was
happy to have a soul wish for me in that place.

The culture or the life they enjoy is from 16 to 40, after that they dont
have children, they dont have neighbors, all alone. It is sick, I am glad
to have a culture that always bonds me with my family..........

2005-11-23T20:16:00.001+05:30

The way you look at things can change the way you analyse
them. There is nothing wrong if you feel that something is not
your kind, emphatically you have your own life. I am not
philosophical but neither practical.

Dont worry, this place will not be an emotional outburst, it is
just me, it is always special. I was hesitant to start because
I can never maintain it, may be I have to.

My first lines, it matters. This place is to remember things that I
can never forget.